You've Got To Be Kidding Part 1of 2

I was recently waiting for my sister to get done washing her clothes at the local laundromat and flipping through a “woman’s magazine” because that was the only thing available. Usually these things bore me to death, but occasionally they do run a good practical article, and this one actually had several in the same publication. 

Then I came across a picture of a man, and it was a man, wearing a pink checked shirt and this weird olive green/tan colored suit thing, who had obviously not shaved for several days, and this was the “after” picture. This was supposed to be an improvement on his old looks. The “before” picture showed him with a long straggly beard, in jeans and a nondescript logger’s shirt. Granted, he did look pretty scruffy, but nothing that a decent shave job and a trip to a men’s store wouldn’t fix.

 Apparently, the poor guy’s very sophisticated girlfriend decided he needed improving. How she managed to talk him into not only putting on the clothes, but also agreeing to being photographed in them for all the female world to see, I don’t know. She must have promised him some incredible noogy, and an awful lot of it. I gotta say, he did sort of look like the type who would simply go along with whatever a strong-willed and good looking girlfriend said.  But still, I have to wonder if it didn’t at least cross his mind what his male friends would say. I’m pretty certain that, at least among the men I know, that outfit would make him the laughing stock of the entire town, and they would never let him live it down.

The next guy’s “improvement,” this one by his daughter, wasn’t really that different than what he was wearing before, except that his new look was much more expensive. He paid something like $400 just for the pants, another $400 for a watch, and $200 for the shoes. 

 The real jaw-dropper, though, was the sweater. It was a simple, cabled white sweater, and this sucker paid over a thousand dollars for it. The description did not say one word about a life-time guarantee against all wear and tear, holes or spots; something he could hand down to his children and grandchildren.